I know very little—nothing really—about buying fruit, but my wife tells me if fruit bruises easily it’s overripe and probably close to its expiration date. Not sure if this is true or not. I checked and one website said, “Bruising does not indicate the produce is past its prime and has gone bad. The bruise is simply displeasing aesthetically but not a health hazard.”

It’s not my place to argue with a fruit expert and no way am I dumb enough to contradict my wife. But it does seem to me that if fruit bruises easily and is “displeasing aesthetically,” it may very well be headed for the trash heap.

Do your feelings bruise easily? (me, check) Are your words and actions aesthetically displeasing? (me, check) If so, you may wish to check your expiration date. Could be you are past your prime and on the way out the door.